It may seem a little excessive to you, especially in light of the fact that we have recently bought a new car, but Mrs L. and I have recently bought some more new wheels! Never fear, we haven’t splashed out another car, we have bought some scooters, and before you ask, no not motor scooters. We’ve got a shiny pair of micro scooters and are now the envy of all of the thirteen year olds in the neighbourhood.
On first examination, one would be forgiven for assuming that this was one my more harebrained schemes, but in fact, this particular act of immaturity came from the normally very sensible Mrs L. Perhaps I ought to start at the beginning of the rather bizarre series of events which led to us becoming the laughing stock of our street.
A couple of months ago, a department store close by to us were selling some really rather good scooters for a bargain price. I’d always wanted to get the kids some, so I nipped down there and bought one for Fraboo and Boy-Boy. Despite some initial reluctance to have a go on them, they were soon whizzing around all over the place, and they looked like they were having so much fun that Mrs L. decided she wanted to join in. Being a keen-lean-scooting-machine, she was able to hop onto another child’s scooter, and start chasing the kids around the asphalt. She was having a whale of a time and thought that this is the type of activity our family should engage in together. The problem was that she was too tall for her transportation, so when we got home, the hunt for some adult sized scooters began.
As adults tend to be a little bigger than their offspring, their scooter’s must be both bigger and more robust, and I thought there would be a pretty small market for such items. A brief search on the internet showed that there were actually quite a few to choose from, the vast majority of which were in lurid fluorescent colours and those which weren’t looked like they were a free gift with a funeral package. Aside from the “X-treme” models with names like “Widowmaker 2000” and “The Crippler”, there were less extravagant offerings, and we agonised over which ones we would like to get. I had assumed that Mrs L. like me, would tire of this plan, or simply forget about it, so imagine my consternation when I would get home from work, and she’d say something like; “Did you know that the “De-anklator” comes with free crutch holders. They think of every possiblilty.”
A month or so ago, I had taken some time off of work so that I could spend some time with Mrs L. while the kids were at school. We decided that we would go out and visit some scooter stores. I had phoned ahead to a couple of places which I had hoped would stock the model I had in mind, but apparently there wasn’t much call for the “Safety Supa-scooter”. Not to be defeated there were a couple of other shops which I thought would be worth a look. So off we went. The first shop was a bit of a waste of time. But at the second one (which I shall call The Scooter Market), we were in luck. Not only did they have a wide selection of steeds, but they were having a sale! This was already seventh heaven for the thrifty Mrs L, but things were about to get even better.
I imagine that the shop manager thought that we were lost, really what would two middle aged clearly unathletic people like Mrs L. and I, and a baby be doing in his shop? He did seem slightly confused when we explained that we were looking for some scooters. It took him a little while for him to understand that we wanted them for ourselves, not an absent teenage child (I didn’t realise I looked that old), but once he did get it, he couldn’t have been more helpful. He invited us to try out each of the models we were keen on, and we spent a happy half hour scooting around on the polished concrete floors of his store. I could see him losing his patience after I knocked over a display for the third time, and so we hurriedly chose the ones we wanted.
We’ve now had our scooters for a month or so, and have become a regular fixture at our local skate parks. We’ve been told our rides are “mean as”, and “dialled” (I assume that these are compliments, but to be quite honest I’ve no idea), and are frequently hounded by the local skate crews
Some of our parent friends have borrowed our scooters and are now thinking of getting some themselves. It’s become such a popular activity for people of our age, that Mrs L. and I have set up our own scooter gang. We are now the two founding member of the “Scootin’, Tootin’ and Galavalutin’” (it makes much more sense when you realise my diet is largely bean based, and one of my other favourite hobbies is galavaluting), and in due course will be designing some club apparel. If you fancy joining, you are very welcome to email me at email@example.com for details.